Walking Dead: Cherokee Rose by Alex Snider

Has there ever been a group of survivors in an apocalyptic drama that deserve to live less than those of Walking Dead? Oh man, It's like not a single one of them ever played the "what would you do to survive the zombie apocalypse" game (the next best game to "what would you spend your lottery winnings on"). More over, it's like not a single one of them has ever had to deal with a zombie to date, as if so far they've had no experience with them what so ever. I mean aside from Maggie who has apparently never seen a zombie killed up close? (Seriously, Maggie? Where is this magical farm? the set of Lost? And how was T-Bone smashing its head in that much worse than its splitting apart at the middle?) Walk around the woods at night? Yeah sure! Dangle Glenn in to a well for some unknown reason to fetch a zombie? Why not! Have a gun-free zone which incidentally is where we're all living? Sounds like the best plan of all time! At this point I think the survivors are actually all zombies themselves given their inability to think coherently.

They've been doing unexplainable things for weeks now but Sunday's episode pushed it over the edge. Really why did they need to get the zombie out of the well? Is it because Shane's extremely long showers have drained the other sixteen wells? Are they just bored? Read a damn book y'all! You're telling me that farm house doesn't have some James Herriots kicking around? Hershel would at least have a few of the books from the Left Behind series. All that was missing from that whole scene was Yakity Sax. At least someone will have something to do when they have to resize Rick's sheriff hat to fit Carl. But then where will Carl nap? : ( 

Am I the only one who finds it unclear as to whether Rick is hanging up his sheriff's costume (when society collapsed it ceased to be an uniform) for good or if we were just witness to his nightly routine of gingerly placing his badge in a special velvet box and praying to it? 

I'm enjoying Shane's descent into guilt-ridden madness. It's very Poe. And his wardrobe is very Steinbeck, very Of Mice and Men. I cannot wait until someone shoots him by a river. 

For Andrea's sake (and for my own sanity) I do very much hope that someone tells her soon that there is more than one way to off herself. I get then she would have literally nothing to talk about once she stopped pining over her gun (maybe she's actually a cyborg that's stuck in a loop? Reboot!). That would also give Dale lots to do, taking away all the rope and water and high places and exhaust and drugs and plastic bags and ovens and knives. 

Lori is apparently one of those people that is desperate for attention but tries to be sly about it by trying to be "discrete" but really they're just drawing even more attention to themselves? Like I don't know when she opted out of the privacy of the magical bathroom with the clog-free sink and never-ending hot water to do her pregnancy test in a field? Unprotected? From the zombies? Then sobs? 

That goes for whatever she wrote on the list for Glenn to pick up at ye olde tymey apothecary shoppe, too. Did she specify a brand of pregnancy test? During the end of days? And then think that somehow Glenn wouldn't notice what it actually was? I mean, he was busy getting it on with Maggie. It's commendable that they were practicing safe sex and all but it's too bad that they weren't practicing safe living-during-the-zombie-apocalypse (I get $0.05 every time I write zombie apocalypse. I'm saving up for a Jet-Ski, it will come in handy during the zombie apocalypse). Like not leaving horses unattended outside on the Pettycoat Junction set or having someone keep watch for zombies.   

My favourite part of the episode was definitely when everyone got out maps under the pretext of splitting up and looking for Sophia and then Darryl went looking for her while Rick looked at scenery and talked about god with Hershel. Seriously, Hershel, your reasoning for a Christian god is because Rick and his family are doing ok (ie they're alive)? What about the rest of humanity? Talk about cherry picking... Or is this some kind of modern day Noah's Ark? And human kind will be restarted by this sorry lot of losers? 

I can only hope that they find Sophia, that she is a zombie and she takes them all out and the next season starts out with a whole new cast who have instincts for survival.